What are cognitive distortions?
Cognitive distortions are sneaky patterns of thinking that distort your perception of reality, leading you to believe things that are either skewed or completely false, especially when it comes to how you see yourself, your body, and your relationship with food.
The good news is, that once you start recognizing these distortions, you can begin to gently challenge and change them. This opens the door to a kinder, more supportive way of thinking.
Here are some common cognitive distortions that show up, especially around food and body image. I'll show you how to spot them, challenge them, and replace them with thoughts that are more supportive of your mental health.
1. Black-and-white thinking
Also known as "all-or-nothing thinking."
Black-and-white thinking divides the world into extremes—good or bad, right or wrong, healthy or unhealthy. This dichotomous thinking prevents you from seeing life as a spectrum filled with nuances and shades of grey.
Hanging out in 'the grey' can feel scary. As humans, putting things into specific boxes with clear labels helps us understand our world.
But life, especially when it comes to our bodies and food, isn’t meant to be black and white. Categorizing food and placing value judgments on your body can lead to a life full of strict rules and rigid boxes.
Our bodies, our food choices, our experiences—none of these fit neatly into “right” or “wrong.”
Instead, life is a beautiful, messy blend of in-betweens and maybes.
When you let go of the need to categorize everything, you open yourself up to more flexibility, spontaneity, and joy.
2. Catastrophizing
Catastrophizing is when we let our minds run wild with the worst possible outcomes. It’s the “what if” spiral that can lead to anxiety and keep us stuck.
Sure, sometimes it’s useful to consider possible negative consequences or outcomes of an action, but when your thoughts start spiraling out of control, it’s time to step back. This intense worry can prevent you from taking any action and moving forward at all.
When you find yourself caught in a "what if" spiral, try playing out the scenario to its end. You might find that the worst-case scenario isn’t as likely or as scary as it seems.
And if it helps, make a plan for how you’d handle things if your fears did come true. Then, take a deep breath, and try to let go. You’ve got a plan in place, so you don’t need to feed those fears anymore.
3. Jumping to conclusions
This distortion shows up when we make assumptions without solid evidence, often through mind reading and fortune telling.
Mind Reading is when we think we know what others are thinking.
For example, “They think I look bad in my bathing suit,” or “She's grossed out by what I ate for dinner tonight.”
But here’s the thing: unless someone tells you what they’re thinking, you really don’t know.
Fortune Telling is when we predict the future without any real proof. It’s like assuming, “If I ask my mom to stop commenting on my weight, she’ll be hurt,” or “If I go shopping, I won’t find anything that fits.”
These are just fear-based guesses, not facts. Instead of letting these thoughts run the show, try looking for evidence that supports a different, kinder perspective.
If you want to apply everything you're reading about here, be sure to snag these free worksheets to help you get clear on what cognitive distortions might be at play in your life and how to work with them!
4. Mental Filtering
Mental filtering is when we focus on the negatives and ignore the positives. It’s like having a spotlight on everything that’s wrong, while the good stuff stays in the shadows.
For instance, if one person in a year tells you that you're "too much," but 20 others tell you how great a friend you are, mental filtering would have you stuck on that one negative comment, replaying it over and over.
Or, if you have a body part that you struggle to love, mental filtering might lead you to stand in front of the mirror and only focus on that part, ignoring all the other things you appreciate about yourself.
To counter mental filtering, try making a conscious effort to acknowledge and believe in the positives. Both the good and the bad are real and valid—they deserve equal attention (or if you want to get wild and crazy about it, you could even try to focus on the positive things MORE than the negative!).
5. Shoulds
“Shoulds” are made-up rules that often feel like a drill sergeant in our heads, telling us what we must do or how we must be and leading straight to guilt and shame. These 'rules' can be self-imposed or culturally enforced.
Life has WAY fewer rules than you think it does.
As humans, we like order, structure, and predictability. So following “rules” gives us a sense of direction and a sense of achievement when we think we've done what's 'expected' of us.
Try replacing “should” with “could.” This simple change offers you choices and the power to make decisions that align with your values and desires.
For example:
"I should go to college" becomes "I could go to college."
"I should exercise" becomes "I could exercise."
When trying to challenge long-held beliefs about what you 'should' do, ask yourself what truly feels good to you and aligns with your values. You can also get curious about where you first heard or learned this 'rule.'
This simple shift opens up a world of possibilities, helping you live from a place of choice rather than obligation. It’s about doing what feels good to you, not what you think you have to do.
A Path Forward
Learning to recognize and challenge these cognitive distortions can make a world of difference in how you feel about yourself, your body, and your relationship with food.
It’s important to recognize when your thoughts are grounded in reality versus when they are distorted by fear, exaggeration, predictions, or assumptions.
As you practice these skills, you’ll likely notice a shift—toward greater self-acceptance, reduced anxiety, and a life that feels more fulfilling.
If you find yourself struggling with these cognitive distortions, don't hesitate to reach out. Whether it’s through my 1:1 coaching or the resource below, you don’t have to go through this alone.
With time, practice, and a little patience, you can nurture healthier thought patterns and create a more compassionate relationship with yourself and your body.